I took notes in order to share with you! So here they are below, my notes from “Vegan Parenting / Raising Vegan Kids” Panel…

Introductions:

• Michelle Schwegmann – Herbivore
  moderator for todays talk
• Sayward Rebhal – Vegan Pregnancy Survival Guide
  18 month old son
• Joanna Vaught – vegan cookbook author
  3 1/2 year old son, runs a daycare
• Sarah Matheny – Peas and Thank You
  4&6 year olds
  transitioned family to 90% vegan
• Ben Grossblatt – Suicide Food
  son is age 9, he says he was ”vegan throughout my wife’s pregnancy”

Fewer than half of room riased hand when asked if they are a parent. One woman was pregnant. Some people said they planned to have vegan children when they got a little older. Later, there was some discussion of adoption as some in the room are planning to adopt.

Dealing with concerned family members:

• Sayward – Remember that you dont have to talk about it every time, be polite, always smile, become educated about nutrition
• Joanna – A good response to well-meaning criticism is to say, “I’m sure that worked very well for your family” It helps to have an arsenal of doctors and websites backing you up. It’s great to be able to say, “My pediatrician isn’t worried” educate yourself
• Sarah – defer to authority and deflect negativity, tell them to go ahead and “call dr. XYZ” but the best defense is having happy healthy kids

Dealing with daycare, school, playdates, etc:

• Ben – bring sack lunches, pack the goodies for parties and whatnot
• Joanna – it’s difficult but diabetic kids go through it, kids with allergies, etc., it’s a challenge but it’s life
• Michelle – kids learn to double check ingredients themselves, explain why and how vegan to both your kids and others in your life so they’re informed
• Sayward – always put a positive spin on things (like how the vegan cupcakes are special)
• Sarah – volunteer, advocate in school etc, get involved in what your kids are learning, offer to supply the treats for school events

At what age do we give the children their own agency to decide whether or not to eat animals?

• Ben – his son thinks of being vegan as part of his identity, parents make choices for their kids, raising kid as a nonvegan is a choice too
• Joanna – it’s an active issue, wont know until we know (cross that bridge when we come to it)

How vegan are you?

• Sarah – kids are vegan at home but vegetarian when out, she provides as much info as possible for their age so they understand the consequences of their food choices, sit down with every caregiver about ALL boundaries (food, smoking, tv, etc.)
• Ben – extended family situations can be complicated, grandma bought veggie slices but ultimately it’s not that big of a deal
• Joanna – case by case basis

How to deal with Thanksgiving at schools?

• Joanna – holidays are tied to memories, have your own vegan family celebration, share leftovers with nonveg family
• Michelle – bring new celebrations and info to schools
• Audience member - approach the teacher because they care

Towards the end there were more questions and audience dialogue about having children with a nonveg partner and dealing with the negotiation of shared parenting. We discussed how raising children always involves some compromises and how raising vegan children is no different. As vegan parents we should strive to raise kids who are aware, empathetic, and compassionate people who have good health, but it’s not about dietary purity. We just do the best – the BEST – we can.

To read notes from other talks given at Vida Vegan Con, please go here: http://www.vegansoapbox.com/topics/vvc2011/

—

Previously at Vegan Soapbox:

• Vegan Parenting Resources
• Can Children Be Vegan?
• The Health Advantages Of Vegan Diets For Children
• Proper Nutrition For Veggie Teens
• Vegan Babies

I was a vegetarian child. So as a kid, meal times often made me feel like an outcast. I was always having to explain or defend my food to other children, teachers, parents, and the like. I grew up feeling like an outsider.

The experience probably made me stronger and I might even be a better person from it all. But explaining, defending, and promoting veganism is a task for adults, not children. Kids just need a safe, loving environment in which to grow.

So how can we make it easier for today’s vegetarian children and tomorrow’s vegan kids?

Here are just a few reminders for anyone who interacts regularly with veg kids:

• Veg kids need veg friends. They need to know they’re not alone. Find other kids who are vegetarian or vegan and introduce them to each other. Being a veg kid at a non-veg meal is a lot easier when there’s another veg kid there, too.
• Veg kids don’t need to be excluded from fast food places like McDonald’s (unless they or their parents want that). A trip to Micky D’s is never about the food anyway; it’s about the toys and the playground. Remember, veg kids can buy the Happy Meal toy without buying the Happy Meal and they can play in the playground without a tummy full of dead cow.
• Let veg kids order for themselves. Ask, ask, ask. Do not assume you know where their boundaries are just because you know two other veg kids. This particular veg kid might be vegan whereas the others you know are vegetarian. Or this veg kid might be veg for religious reasons while the others are veg for health or allergies.
• But don’t grill them. Don’t make them defend their veg-ness. Don’t put them on the spot and expect them to give a speech about it. Don’t assume they want to talk about it. Just ask what they like to eat.
• Step in when someone else grills them.

Got other ideas for how to help veg kids in situations where the food isn’t veg? Please share!