Last week I was on the phone with a friend from back in Salt Lake, and she brought up my web site and how she had made her friends from school read it. She’s a vegetarian and I’ve heard a couple stories about her friends giving her a hard time about it, so I was naturally curious about their reactions. Especially since I’d like to think of my site as something non-vegans can read and think about without feeling attacked or vilified. Not an easy thing to do when one of your writers is in the habit of attacking people like it’s his job, but one can hope.

From the awkward pause after the question was asked, however, I gathered reviews from the non-vegan set were less than favorable. I guess they feel that we’re self-righteous and more than a little arrogant. It’s a complaint I think I lot of vegans (and vegetarians) hear on a regular basis, at least when you’re trying to broach the subject with non-vegans. I’m the first to admit it’s a touchy subject, but if I think I’m better than you I promise it has nothing to do with veganism and everything to do with the fact that I’m smarter, cuter, and a much snappier dresser. Plus I look better in hats. That alone gives me a reason to feel smug.

As a vegetarian I spent a decade and change feeling the same way about vegans. Every one I knew had told me exactly why I was wrong to just be a vegetarian on several different occasions. Nothing is a bigger turn off than being told why you’re pretty much the scum of the earth for trying to do the right thing. It took me years to get over the unpleasant association, years in which the majority of the people who had acted out their self-righteous fantasies on me went back to eating meat, eggs and dairy. Obviously pissing people off is very poor way to go about changing their minds - acting self-righteous doesn’t do veganism any good, and it sure as hell doesn’t help any animals.

In addition to the phone call, last week was marked by a letter to the editor about a friend of mine who wrote an op-ed about animal rights. For his trouble, he got called self-righteous, and it got me to thinking - why? Why is it that when you try to defend other sentient beings, to keep them from being nothing more than objects, resources, that you are called self-righteous. Should we ignore arguments that are fundamentally flawed, inaccurate facts, prejudice and ignorance? No. The day I discover an argument against animal rights that makes more sense than the ones for it, I will have no choice but to stop fighting, but I don’t believe that day will ever come.

Let’s get this straight right now. Being a vegan doesn’t make you a good person. I think by some people’s standards I could easily be conceived as a bad person. Being an omnivore doesn’t make you a bad person. The majority of my friends and family are meat eaters. I love them, and I believe they are good, solid people or I’d dump them faster than a high school jock dumps a girlfriend who won’t put out. That doesn’t mean I refrain from talking to them about veganism and trying to make the case. I know I’m not better than them, not in this matter. It has taken me years to change the way I think, and I’ve been incredibly lucky to be able to do so. To have an enlightened conversation about anything you need two parties, and there’s too much at risk to offend one. As I tell my mom, I’m not trying to tell you how to do anything - I’m pleading with you to please, just think about what I’m saying. What I have to say may be offensive, and because it runs contrary to what we have been taught is normal, it’s hard to hear and even harder to stomach.

Veganism and vegetarianism aren’t an exclusive club. It’s not about us and them. It’s about everyone learning and thinking. I truly believe that most people have no desire to hurt animals, and given the facts will accept veganism as a moral baseline. This isn’t about me being better than you, more right than you. It’s about the fact that we kill and torture millions of non-human animals, feeling, caring, sentient animals, every year for reasons that cannot be justified. I say we because I have a part in it too. How do you accept such a responsibility? It’s hard, but not impossible.

Veganism isn’t about purity. It’s about thinking about the impact your actions have on other beings and choosing your actions accordingly. As the existentialist Sartre said, we as human are defined only by the actions we choose. Our daily actions choose the way we wish to define ourselves and our species.

Throughout history there have been groups of people who were systematically discriminated against, discrimination that was justified in the minds of the majority at the time. There have also been people who stood up against this discrimination, people who were probably called self-righteous, and yet they continued to fight because they knew their beliefs were right, and that it was up to them to pick their actions accordingly. For me as a vegan, that means that I am responsible for educating people, for bringing these issues up. I do it not to make you feel bad about yourself, not to attack you as a person, but because I respect you enough to think you should know. Don’t let the mild attacks of sarcasm fool you: I’m rooting for ya.
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photo credit: _nickd

Sections: Vegan Et Cetera, Vegan Theory
Topics: self-righteousness, stereotypes, veg, Vegan