Many vegans are afraid to speak up. They worry that doing so will threaten the friendship. But if you keep it civil and focus on the animal cruelty then the discussion doesn’t have to put friendships in jeopardy. Remember that all relationships involve some conflict. The problem isn’t the disagreement. The problem is the resolution. If there isn’t any resolution (where both parties feel respected and heard; where apologies are given and accepted; where there’s mutual agreement to move forward rather than linger in past hurt) that’s where the problems lie. But if you converse with respect and care, you won’t jeopardize the friendship. If you just make sure to try to understand their perspective then these conversations will be more productive. To do that, ask questions and try to remember how you thought before you went vegan.

Another technique for creating positive change in others is to acknowledge that any reduction in animal product consumption is a win for animals, the planet, and human health. Of course we want people to go all the way and go vegan. But we shouldn’t let our long-term goals cloud our interpretation of short-term successes. Many people are more receptive to learning about animal cruelty and adopting vegan eating if they don’t feel like it has to be “all or nothing.”

Lastly, choose your battles. You may not want to take every single opportunity to advocate for farmed animals. So sometimes you may want to limit the discussions to a one-on-one basis rather than with a group of nonvegans; this way the playing field is more even and you can have more of an impact. Or you may want to have the discussions in private email rather than publically on Facebook. Sometimes you’ll want to just sit back and let others do all the talking so you can better understand their perspectives and so they feel respected. Moreover, you don’t want to interfere with any actual progress they’re making on behalf of companion animal cruelty. You do want to support them in that!

Now, with the above said, here are some ideas for how to respond. When a nonvegan makes a commitment to help end cruelty to companion animals, you can take that opportunity to say…

• “Aww that makes me so sick when people are cruel to animals. Did you know that the same kind of suffering happens everyday on factory farms?” Then you can show them the short film, Farm to Fridge and ask them what they think.
• “Bravo to you for standing up for companion animals! Now are you ready to take the next step and stand up for farmed animals too?” You can follow up by asking them to boycott factory farmed meat or go vegetarian a few days a week. Give them a goal that feels realistic to them. Don’t ask them to change everything all at once if that’s going to feel too overwhelming to them. Instead, give them a target within their reach.
• “All kinds of animal cruelty are wrong. I’m really glad that we have some laws that protect pets. Did you know that farmed animals like pigs and chickens don’t have any significant legal protections?” You can follow up by offering information about how to join an organization like MFA, HSUS, or ALDF so they can participate in legal campaigns to increase protections for all animals.
• “It’s our moral obligation to prevent needless animal cruelty. That’s why I support what you’re doing to raise awareness about animal cruelty. That’s also why I’m vegan.” Here you can offer a veg starter guide or offer to loan them a vegan cookbook. This would be a good place to tell your story about how you made your transition to veg*nism.

Got other ideas for good responses? Feel free to share them in the comments below!

Little did I know at the time that Terry has come out with another cookbook! Byant Terry’s new cookbook is called Inspired Vegan: Seasonal Ingredients, Creative Recipes, Mouthwatering Menus. Both cookbooks are a delight to the eyes with interesting photos and drawings included. And although I have yet to test any recipes from the latter cookbook, I’m sure it’s just as delightful to the tastebuds.

Back onto the topic of incorporating vegan versions of food that is (or perceived to be) traditionally nonvegan, I have some more ideas:

1. Begin with the concept behind the food, rather than the food itself. Veganizing “traditional” foods can be tricky because people are often resistant to change. But remember that all celebrations are essentially about some kind of change or progress. For example, in the Jewish holiday of Passover (which is similar in some ways to Juneteenth because it represents liberation from slavery) some of the foods on a Seder plate are not vegetarian or vegan. But for as long as I can remember there have been articles in magazines about how to celebrate Passover without hurting animals. VegNews has a guide for how it can be done. Check it out >>
2. Remember that food is power. Our food choices matter. With each bite of vegan food we choose to support compassion and freedom from suffering. With each bite of nonvegan food we support suffering and needless death. Celebrations are not only recognitions of the past, they can be pathways towards the future. Food is a large part of what kind of future we will see. Do we want a future with clean air, clean water, kind people, and peaceful living? Or do we want a future that clings to the past so tightly that it destroys our health, planet, and our most precious resources: our compassion? See more about this at The Food Empowerment Project >>
3. Use good food. For any kind of celebration, you must make sure the food is as tasty as possible. This is especially important for vegan food because a lot of people expect it to taste poorly. And unfortunately, those expectations actually influence how the food tastes to them. The less open-minded someone is to a new food, the less likely they will enjoy that new food. So make sure the vegan food you choose is highly palatable to a wide variety of people. That might mean you’ll need to use more oil and salt than usual. That’s OK. It’s a celebration, afterall, not the first day on a weight loss diet.

This series will provide a quote from the book that captures an important concept. Then I will illustrate that concept with an example or two that might help Soapbox readers go (or stay) vegan. To live vegan in a nonvegan world requires some willpower (if not in avoiding nonvegan foods then in avoiding fruitless debates with nonvegans or antivegans). The articles here will loosely follow the book from begining to end.

This is part two of the series: Exercise. (Part one was Awareness and you can read that here >> )

From the book:

“Exercise turns out to the be the closest thing to a wonder drug that self-control scientists have discovered. [...] Fifteen minutes on a treadmill reduces cravings, as seen when researchers try to tempt dieters with chocolate and smokers with cigarettes. The long-term effects of exercise are even more impressive. It not only relieves ordinary, everday stress, but it’s as powerful an antidepressant as Prozac. Working our also enhances the biology of self-control by increasing te ebaseline heart rate variability and training of the brain. [...] Physical exercise – like meditation – makes your brain bigger and faster, and the prefrontal cortex shows the largest training efect.”

We already know that exercise has it’s own benefits like improved physical health. And as explained elsewhere on Vegan Soapbox, exercise creates dietary wiggle room that allows for the occasional treat or relatively low levels of some nutrients. But now we also know that exercise can help improve our willpower too!

Have you ever noticed that a lot of vegans embrace yoga? Not only are the philosophies of many yoga instructors based on ahimsa (the avoidance of violence), but there’s probably another reason why yoga is a favorite amongst vegans. Yoga combines both exercise and meditation, which is an incredibly powerful combination for increasing one’s willpower, which in turn makes going or staying vegan easier.

I’m not going to lie, I used to hate yoga. There was something off-putting to me about it. I didn’t like the fakes who did yoga and then ran to McDonald’s on the way home. I didn’t like the feeling that I could burn more calories doing cardio kickboxing. I didn’t like the smell of some yoga studios. I could go on. But I’m starting to like it more as I get a little older. I like the peacefulness I sometimes feel during or after yoga. The relaxation I acheive after a good yoga session is simply better than most other exercises. There are still aspects I dislike, but it’s growing on me for sure. Maybe you’re like me and you just need to give yoga another chance?

Or not. You don’t have to like yoga. Any exercise will work to increase your willpower. Any exercise will help you go or stay vegan! Go for a hike or walk the dog. Go swimming or running. Play with your kids or garden in the yard. Do a zumba class or lift some weights. Ride a bike or have a solo dance party in your living room. The author of The Willpower Instinct, Kelly McGonigal, points out that exercise needn’t be intense nor difficult. All that’s required is that you are able to “answer no to the following two questions: 1. Are you sitting, standing still, or lying down? 2. Are you eating junk food while you do it?”

So what are you waiting for? Get moving!

—

Photo credit: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:YogaClass.jpg

Profits from the sale of these chocolates support Farm Sanctuary’s work on behalf of abused and neglected farmed animals.

If you want to follow up the gift with dinner, try PETA’s recipes this year, and support that animal rights organization in the process.

Other ideas for Valentine’s Day from this very site:

Soapbox 2008

and also 2008

In what animal-friendly way are you going to celebrate February 14?

Style guru Martha Stewart has joined Farm Sanctuary to oppose factory farming. She talks a bit about why we should all speak out against it.  Join Martha and Farm Sanctuary and the millions who already speak for the animals by (1) not eating them and (2) expressing your support for bills that restrict factory farming operations. This is an issue that crosses political lines. After visiting the Farm Sanctuary website you might want to stop at the Humane Farming Association‘s, and see what they are doing to make factory farms a thing of the past.

These are things to help you stay healthy, learn about animal and environmental issues, or use to convince others to join you on your vegan path. There are videos, a podcast, recipe database, and more…

Share these resources with your nonvegan friends and family members to help them think differently about animals. And be sure to bookmark this page or print it it out for your own reference…

1. Vegan Video – a great, vegan inspiring video without graphic images. The focus is mostly on environmentalism.
2. Earthlings - a feature length film about human-nonhuman interactions. The movie is available online in many different places.
3. Farm to Fridge – a short documentary about the production of meat, dairy, and eggs
4. Compassionate Cook Podcasts – a great aural resource for new vegans, vegetarians, or anyone interested in learning more about veganism and animal rights.
5. Vegan Starter Kits – a variety of downloadable recipes, information, and resources.
6. Vegan Health – a great set of detailed articles about nutrition for vegans
7. Nutrition Facts – similar to Vegan Health but this one is mostly video-based rather than article-based
8. PCRM’s Power Plate – a good visual guide for basic nutrition information, accessable and easy to use
9. VegWeb – a huge database of vegan recipes complete with reviews and photos

What are some of your favorite resources? Please leave a link and description of your favorite vegan resources in the comments below…

As a vegan parent of a two-year-old, I liked this list of things she wrote about how we veg parents can share our veg values with our kids:

“Read books and watch movies that affirm and reinforce vegan values. VegBooks lists over 500 titles.”

“Visit an animal sanctuary. Exposing vegan kids to rescued farm animals is so important — it helps them make the connection between their cruelty-free lifestyle and the animals they are saving.”

“Get together with local veg families so that your kids will have the opportunity to meet other like-minded kids, and you’ll get to meet other like-minded parents. If you live in the NYC area, join my meet-up group: NYC Vegetarian and Vegan Families. If a meet-up group like that doesn’t exist in your area, think about starting one.”

“Show your kids the power of activism! If they feel strongly about a specific animal or issue, encourage them to join a protest, write a letter to a newspaper, have a vegan bake sale, hand out literature, or create an art project. This will empower them and teach them to be a voice for the voiceless.”

“Search for websites and blogs about raising veg kids. Many of them, including my own, RaisingVegKids.com, offer resources, articles, and support for vegan families.”

“Make holidays special. Instead of focusing on what kids can’t do or eat, make vegan versions of traditional dishes, and even crafts. For example, make a vegan gingerbread house or egg-free potato latkes, and color papier-mâché Easter eggs.”

“Cook and bake delicious vegan recipes with your kids. Order the book, Vegan Lunchbox.”

“When dining out at a non-vegan restaurant, look to the side dishes (instead of the meat- and dairy-heavy kid’s menu), where you’ll find healthy and yummy choices such as veggies, beans, rice, etc.”

“Adopt a rescued farm animal (virtually). Farm Sanctuary will send you a picture of an animal of your choice with some fun details about him or her. Your kids can frame it and keep it in their room, and even visit their adopted animal at the sanctuary. They can even bring the picture to school and tell their classmates all about it, effectively spreading the message. Of course, if you have the space, adopt a real rescued farm animal whom kids can help care for and love.”

“Be an active parent when it comes to birthday parties and school events. Find out what is being served, and if it’s not vegan, make or buy a similar vegan version so that your child will not feel left out. Make enough for the other kids, too, so that they can see first-hand how delicious compassion can taste.”

“Show your kids that being vegan is fun! Make vegan pancakes on the weekend, or have a vegan pizza party on a school night. Make things like DIY vegan ice cream sundaes, or, on movie night, popcorn with vegan butter.”

In the books department, let me suggest Granny Gomez and Jigsaw. The illustrations are cute and friendly. The story is funny and non-preachy. And it’s appropriate for reading to any age. And if you can’t visit a farmed animal sanctuary or sponsor a rescued animal, you can still visit the local animal shelter and simply remind your kiddos that pigs and chickens are not all that different from cats and dogs. Helping your children develop emapthy for any nonhuman species is a good thing!

But obviously, the more challenging thing about vegan parenting isn’t the issue of instilling veg values in our children. For most of us that will come naturally. The more difficult aspect of veg parenting is dealing with the nonvegans who are critical of our choices. Many nonvegans won’t say anything, or if they do say something it’s a geniune question. But some nonvegans will actively interfere with your parenting choices. For example, they will tempt your child with nonvegan foods or they will lecture your child about meat-eating. Honest conversations with your child and with anyone who cares for him/her will help overcome those challenges. There will be difficulties, but they are not barriers. And there are plenty of us vegan parents who are more than willing to help brain storm solutions and help you problem-solve.

For more articles about vegan and vegetarian parenting, check out the kids section of Vegan Soapbox: http://www.vegansoapbox.com/topics/kids/ and be sure to take a look at RaisingVegKids.com.

But as I started reading I immediately realized that the tools in this book are perfect for aspiring vegans. I can’t count how many times have nonvegans told me “I just don’t have the willpower to go vegan” or “I can’t resist cheese”! The strategies described in The Willpower Instinct are exactly the sorts of things that can turn a wannbe vegan into a “vegan for life.”

In that vein, I’ve decided to write a series of posts here at Vegan Soapbox that highlight a key point made in The Willpower Instinct and then illustrate an example or two for how that concept might help VS readers go (or stay) vegan. The articles here will loosely follow the book from begining to end. This is part one of the series: Awareness.

From the book:

“This may sound simple, but psychologists know that most of our choices are made on autopilot, without any real awareness of what’s driving them, and certainly without serious reflection on their consequences. Heck, most of the time, we don’t even realize we’re making a choice. For example, one study asked people how many food related decisions they made in one day. What would you say? On average, people guessed fourteen. In reality, when these same folks carefully tracked their decisions, the average was 227. That’s more than two hundred choices people were initially unaware of – and those are just the decisions related to eating. How can you control yourself if you aren’t even aware that there is something to control?”

McGonigal then explains that one of the first steps to changing behavior is to track the behavior. She says that we have to switch off the autopilot and start being aware of what we’re doing.

Obviously, when it comes to food a great way to do that is to use a food diary. When we use a food diary it helps us become more aware of what/who we’re eating. We can also start to notice other factors: when and where, how and with whom. We can notice triggers and trends. And this will be the foundation for making change. This will inform us of which areas need the most work, what other nonfood things might be helpful to avoid or include, and so forth.

A food diary is great for a number of reasons. It not only helps you become of aware of when you’re eating and what you’re eating, it also helps you set up a baseline from which to guage progress. All too often we begin down a path of personal transformation and then plateau at a point where where we seem to forget the progress we’ve made. At that point, relapse is common. So if you start with good data it makes it easy to measure your progress and celebrate the small victories. When it comes to veganism, this is especially important. For example, for the nearly-vegan it can be good to remember that one piece of dairy cheese pizza doesn’t undo all the vegan meals eaten.

So, if you’re not yet vegan then start a food diary to track your eating. For a couple weeks don’t try to change your habits, just pay attention to them. This will help you begin to become more self-aware and ready to change.

If you’re already vegan but feel you may relapse soon (or maybe you already have) do the same thing and track your eating. Take note of when you feel being vegan is easy and when you feel it is hard. Try to see if there’s any correlation between other things (like drinking alcohol or going out to eat at certain restaurants). Becoming aware of why you’re struggling to stay vegan is the first step to changing those habits and keeping you eating a diet that’s good for animals, the planet, and you too.

And finally, if you’re already vegan but you want to eat a bit healthier then start a food diary and notice when you’re choosing the less healthy vegan options as opposed to the healthier ones.

Becoming aware of our poor choices is the first step to changing them.

LOVE blogger Victor wrote:

“while reading a pamphlet we’ve been developing about circuses, an activist stopped at the line, ‘Some animals, like elephants, may be forced to work for over 45 years for our entertainment,’ and suggested replacing the word ‘our’ with ‘your.’ This comment intrigued me because the word ‘our’ was deliberately chosen to suggest a particular approach to advocacy and so I started thinking more about what that word represents.”

“‘Our’ reminds me not to think of myself as separate from those I am reaching out to and to instead understand that we are doing the best we know how. With this understanding, veganism is a process rather than an endpoint. Veganism as process means I am continually learning about veganism and that my path towards the vegan ideal is meandering and ongoing. So ‘our’ helps head off the judgment that I am ‘good’ and they are ‘bad’ by reminding me that we are all learning how to live our lives at the same time.”

Victor is onto something. He’s trying to connect with people who have different viewpoints about animals. He’s trying to empathize and guide rather than judge and instruct. Carol L. Glasser at the Humane Research Council is also interested in this idea of language. She wrote:

“Replacing descriptive words with euphemisms or using subtle language to describe extreme concepts masks the exploitation, misuse and abuse of other animals. For example, to make meat-eating more tolerable, words such as poultry, hamburger, and bacon are used to replace more accurate words like dead chicken flesh, shredded cow body, and sliced pig belly.” [...]

“If simply describing our movement with different words can have a significant effect on how willing others are to listen to our message, it is clear that the language used to talk about the animals for whom we advocate will likely have an impact.”

And then Glasser drops the bomb:

“Unfortunately, research has not explored how shifting language can shift outcomes for animals.”

Yes, we shouldn’t jump to conclusions about which words will have the most impact. And we should be careful about advocating a stance that isn’t justifed by science. Perhaps a subtle shift like “your” to “our” will change more hearts and minds and generate more compassion for animals. Or it might not have any effect at all.

Words are useful tools for expressing ideas and producing change. But they are not ends in themselves. If your reader doesn’t share your perspective, your understanding, your assumptions, etc., then all your ideas about the importance of a particular word choice falls to the wayside. The message is lost and your meaning is missed.

So, instead of debating and writing essays on the philosophy behind using the word “our” versus using the word “your,” more time should be spent measuring the efficacy of various words and techniques. That is, instead of focusing so much on YOUR meaning, try focusing on the audience and THEIR understanding. What do they need to hear in order to get them to change their behaviors?

Luckily, this is exactly what HRC is doing. In 2004 they did research and found that the average person is more receptive to the term “animal advocate” than the term “animal activist.”

When you write anything, think about who is reading and what they need to hear in order to compel them to act. What do people who are going to circus need to read in order to decide to turn around and boycott the circus? What emotions must they feel? Who should they identify with? What needs of theirs must be met? Are they even going to read? How much do they understand/ what is their reading level?

In my mind, there’s an even more important question: Does it even make sense to waste space with words? Would images convey more?

I was just recently at a circus protest and one of the other protesters commented that he thought most passersby didn’t even read the signs and most just thought to themselves, “Here are a bunch of people who don’t like the circus. They must have a good reason. I’m not going to the circus.” I think he might be onto something. When I see protesters I’m intrigued and I try to read their signs, but even if I can’t figure out what they’re protesting, I get an automatic negative feeling about the business they’re protesting.

The circus is cruel.
Boycott cruelty.
Boycott the circus.

Does much more need to be said? What and how should it be said in order to be convincing and effective?

—

Editor’s Note: this article was originally published in June 2009. After minor edits it has been republished in 2012.

“Meat eating in the United States is going out of style. According to a Department of Agriculture report, Americans are projected to eat 12.2 percent less meat in 2012 than they did 2007. And it’s not just the weak economy. As Mark Bittman observes, there’s a real long-term trend here: ‘Beef consumption has been in decline for about 20 years; the drop in chicken is even more dramatic, over the last five years or so; pork also has been steadily slipping for about five years.’” read more >>

“With so many folks facing dairy intolerance who also crave a healthy diet, veganism is growing in popularity. If you’re looking for a sure-fire way of reducing cholesterol and subsequent coronary artery disease, lowering your weight as well as your risk for cancer, then eating vegan or vegetarian a couple of times a week is the way to go.” continue reading to get a recipe >>

Compassion Over Killing (COK) is putting their ads up on HULU. Over one million HULU viewers will see the 30-second vegetarian commercial, “A Side of Truth.” Watch the ad here >>

A New York Times writer exposes an anti-vegan culture in this piece about traveling to the midwest. “In Nebraska, a place where cattle outnumber people, vegetarians are sometimes accused of undermining the state economy. The owner of what was billed as the lone vegetarian restaurant in Omaha said it had several pounds of ground beef thrown at its doors shortly after opening. After a short run, it closed last year.” Read it here >>

Eating too much processed meat may increases the risk of pancreatic cancer, new research published in the British Journal of Cancer found. Read the press release >>